hate cat

Roommate Hates My Cat: How to Improve the Relationship

hate cat
  1. Teach your roommate how to interact with your cat, and never to force it to interact. Also to give it space.
  • Allow time for your roommate and cat to adjust to each other
  • Keep your home clean: vacuum and change the litterbox daily
  • Teach your cat boundaries

When your roommate hates your cat, it can cause unwanted tension. If you love your furry feline, the last thing you want to do is get rid of it to please your roommate. Instead, try helping to improve the relationship between your roommate and your cat.

Odds are your roommate has never been around a cat very much, or perhaps they assume they don’t like cats. There are several ways you can help your roommate come to know, understand, and maybe even love your four-legged friend.

Here is a look at 9 ways to help improve the relationship between your roommate and your cat:

 

1. Teach Your Roommate How to Best Interact with Your Cat

cat interact

As mentioned, the possibility that your roommate has not interacted  with cats that often will be the culprit for their negative energy towards your pet.

You can step in and teach your roommate how best to interact with your cat to help improve their relationship.

  1. It’s important to remember you should never force interactions. Let your cat interact with your roommate on their own terms instead of forcing it. You can do things to make the interactions more enjoyable, but never forced.
  2. Instruct your roommate to let the cat come to them. Sometimes people try to force their affection on cats, which makes them act out or become anxious.

Instead, your roommate can allow the cat to come to them on the cat’s terms. By enabling the cat to initiate the interaction, they will be more comfortable, and it will help the cat get used to your roommate.

  • Teach your roommate to adjust their body posture to be less threatening to the cat. Sometimes if a person approaches a cat too quickly or do so while they are standing up, it can spook the cat and make it  agitated or upset. 

Instead, teach your roommate to crouch down in a half-seated position, so they appear to be smaller in size. Your roommate can hold their hand out to the cat to show the cat that they are harmless.

By adjusting their body posture, your roommate is exhibiting non-threatening behavior. Your cat will be more likely to want to approach your roommate during this time.

The cat also needs to know that they can come to your roommate on their terms, instead of being forced. Let your roommate offer a treat during this time to help coax the cat to trust them more.

You may find that as your roommate does not know how to communicate with cats, so they have always had adverse reactions from them. Some people even interact with them like they do with a human.

Cats see these ways as aggressive or threatening, and so react badly to them. As a result of these unpleasant experiences, your roommate hates cats. Hopefully with this knowledge, your roommate will have pleasant experiences with your cat and so not hate it anymore.

 

2. Allow Your Roommate and Cat to Adjust to One Another

getting to know cat

9 times out 10, if your roommate hates your cat, they are just not used to the cat. It takes animals a while to get used to one another, and the same can be said for humans and pets.

Allow your roommate and your cat time to adjust to one another in an attempt to make the home a more harmonious place. There are several ways your roommate and cat can adapt to one another.

  1. It may seem like an odd thing to do, but ask your roommate for a piece of their clothing that they have recently worn. The piece of clothing needs to be worn and not washed so that your roommate’s smell is on the clothing.


Ideally, a piece of clothing they do not value. Once you have the item, place it somewhere in the house where the cat will be around it frequently, for example, somewhere in your room.

In keeping a piece of your roommate’s clothing near your cat, you are helping your furry friend feel more comfortable around them. This action will help to improve the relationship between them by helping your cat adjust to your roommate’s scent. Your cat will be more likely to engage in positive interactions once they are fully adapted to your roommate.

  • Keep the interaction between the cat and your roommate to a minimum until the cat becomes more adjusted to your roommate’s scent. Once this is gone, it is possible to begin letting them interact slowly.

    It’s important to give the cat space from your roommate. Giving a cat space is an excellent way for them to adjust to their surroundings slowly. Allow it to keep its distance and let it know that it can leave the room at any time.

    The key is to be consistent in allowing your cat to interact with your roommate as they want.

  • Calming pheromones may be an option to help your cat relax in the presence of your roommate. These pheromones come in a wide variety of products such as sprays, diffusers, and even tablets.

    You could purchase some sprays and diffusers, then place them throughout the house. This will help your cat relax a bit more to help make interacting with your roommate more enjoyable.

  • Reward your cat for good behavior when it correctly interacts with your roommate. For example, if the cat approaches your roommate, and allows your roommate to pet it, offer it a treat afterward.

    This type of reward system will reinforce positive behavior in your cat, which will help create a more positive relationship between the cat and your roommate.

Hopefully over time, your roommate will fall in love with your cat and the hate will no longer be there.  

 

3. Keep Your Home as Clean as Possible

clean up after cat

Sometimes the main reason your roommate hates your cat is because they believe cats, or possibly pets in general,  cause dirt, smell and mess.

In an attempt to help your roommate see your cat in a different light, it is recommended that you keep the apartment as clean as possible from anything caused by the cat.

These are to avoid any issues with your roommate, while also helping to make living with a cat more pleasant for them:.

  1. One of the best ways to keep your home clean while owning a cat is to vacuum daily to avoid any excessive cat hair building up throughout the house.

  2. Investing in an air purifier is another excellent way to keep your apartment clean. Air purifiers work to help cleanse the air of any cat dander that may be lurking.

If your roommate suffers from allergies, the air purifier will help to cleanse the air, so they are less likely to have any issues.

  • Cleaning the litter box often is another perfect way to keep your apartment clean. It is recommended that you clean the litter box at least once daily to help reduce the amount of litter your cat can track throughout the house.

  • Changing the type of litter you use can also significantly reduce the amount of litter left on your cat’s paws after use.


Switching to a litter made from recycled paper such as Frisco Recycled Paper Litter can be a great move. This litter comes in hard pellets that cannot stick to your cat’s paws as easily as regular clumping clay litter can.

The best part? This pellet litter works the same way clumping clay litter does, so you don’t have to worry about any excessive messes in your cat’s litter box.

  • Investing in a better litter box can also help keep your apartment in better shape. Litter boxes that feature a dome or high walls will help keep your cat from kicking litter out of the box whenever they are pawing around inside.

 

4. Make Sure Your Cat Respects Boundaries

cat overstepping boundaries

Your roommate is more likely to accept and try to get along with your cat if the cat respects boundaries.

If your feline friend tends to be a little on the wild side, meaning they like to claw everything and knock things over, your roommate will hate it and is not going to put in an effort into getting along with them. 

You must work with your cat to help it understand how best to respect boundaries. Not just your roommates, but also for you.

By doing this, you’re creating a great training tool that will help improve the relationship between you and your pet. Also, encouraging a more positive relationship with your roommate.

  1. You will have to work with your cat to be sure it knows how to respect boundaries properly. If you do not teach it, it will not learn. So be patient and loving as you show your cat the proper way to interact with your roommate and within your home.

  2. It is crucial never to punish or be rough with your cat as you go through this training transition. Your cat is trying to learn a new behavior, so punishing  or startling it, will only make it turn towards aggression or anxiety.

Instead, be patient and easy as you help your cat learn their boundaries. For example, if your roommate hates your cat when it jumps up on the furniture or counters, you will have to work to teach it that that is a boundary it should not cross.

When your cat jumps on the furniture or counter, simply pick your cat up and place it in another area. You will have to do this repeatedly, but eventually, your cat will learn that if it jumps up on that furniture or counter, you are just going to remove them.

Eventually, your cat will have no desire to do this because they will not want to deal with being picked up and removed from the area.  The effect of this technique is substantial. You will be able to use when it when training your cat to respect boundaries in the home.

  • Work with your roommate to help them understand how to help your cat understand boundaries. If your roommate can look past hating your cat and sees the potential to be helpful in this situation, then you and your cat can both benefit from their involvement.

Your cat will see your roommate’s involvement in the training process as a term of endearment and will help improve their relationship as a whole.

 

5. Get Your Roommate to Interact with Other Lovable Cats

play with cats

If the relationship between your cat and roommate isn’t where it needs to be, and your cat is not going to be showing your roommate any affection anytime soon, it’s a good idea to let your roommate interact with other lovable cats.

Sometimes people associate cats with being aggressive, not affection pets like they may do with dogs. Any cat owner and lover know that this is not true.

To help your roommate see past that mind frame, take them to interact with other lovable cats to help change their thinking.

  1. Your local animal shelter is an excellent place to start if you’re unsure of where to take your roommate. Animal shelters love to have volunteers help feed and water the animals. If you and your roommate take some time to volunteer, this can be an excellent opportunity for your roommate to interact with loving cats. Not only will you both get to enjoy being around animals, but you will both be doing an excellent service for the community and the pets who are in need.

    I  recommend you look up your local animal shelter to check their hours, talk to them about volunteering, and find out more about their pet events, which are also excellent places for your roommate to get his feel for loving pets.  
  • Believe it or not, you can find several places to interact with lovable kitties. For example, some cities have “cat cafes” like the popular Mac Tabby Charlotte’s Cat Café located in Charlotte, North Carolina. This cat cafe is essentially a coffee shop where you can sip on coffee while you interact with different furry felines.

  • Another excellent way to help your roommate interact with lovable cats is by looking for “cat events,” such as “kitty yoga.” Much like the famous “goat yoga” trend, kitty yoga is an event where you can enjoy yoga while also enjoying lovable cats.

 

6. Show Your Roommate How to Read Your Cat’s Behavior

cat body language

Cats give many signals to help people understand their moods or actions. The trouble is that most people do not know how to read or understand these signals.

Without this knowledge your roommate may be having a hard time with your cat, and no wonder why they may be starting to dislike it. 

To help your roommate understand your cat’s behavior, help them understand the different signs and signals your  cat  displays with  its  body language to help you know how it is feeling.

  1. Your cat will give you physical cues to help you know how they are feeling. By helping your roommate  understand this, you can help them better understand your cat’s actions.

Teach your roommate how to read the cat’s body language. According to Tuftandpaw.com, if your cat’s tail is high and fluffed up with an arched back, this can represent that the cat is feeling aggressive or uncomfortable.

If their tail is up high, but they have normal body posture while facing you, then this can represent that they are feeling comfortable and at ease.

If their tail is down, curled around them, while they are crouching down with ears pinned back, this can represent that they are feeling very anxious and uneasy.

Helping your roommate understand these physical cues will help them be able to read your cat’s behavior in a new way.

  • Another way you can read your cat’s behavior is simply by the way they hold their tail. Observing your cat’s tail could help you and your roommate understand their behavior.

If their tail is raised high in the air and is vibrating, this indicates that your cat is generally feeling friendly and possibly even excited, happy, or content.

If its  tail is tucked down low, your cat could be experiencing some feelings of anxiety and even fear.

If the tail is repeatedly moving back and forth, or even side to side, in a flicking motion, this indicates that your cat is feeling upset or agitated.

  • Your roommate can also understand your cat’s behavior based on the way it  holds their ears. 

    If the ears are high and erect, this indicates that the cat is very alert and aware of their surroundings. The cat could be observing something outside the window, or focusing their attention on something making movement.


If the ears are forward, this indicates that they are feeling calm and even confident.

If the ears are flattened down against their head this can mean that they are feeling high amounts of stress, anger, or fear.

  • Observing your cat’s eyes can also be a link in determining the cause of their behavior:

Slow blinking eyes can mean that they are feeling comfortable or even trust. Most cats who exhibit this type of eye movement are in the presence of their owners or someone they generally feel safe and calm around.

Dilated eyes are a big indicator that your cat is very stimulated and alert. If you have ever given a cat any catnip, then you know how dilated their eyes will become upon smelling the herbs. This is because the catnip stimulates the cat and causes their eyes to dilate.

Cat’s will exhibit dilated eyes if they are excited as well as afraid, depending on the situation they are in.

If the cat’s eyes are very narrow with constricted pupils, then this is a sign of aggression. If your cat exhibits this type of eye movement, you will probably need to diffuse the situation by removing them from whatever is making them aggressive. Place them in an area where they will feel safe and secure to help put it at ease.

 

7. Allow Your Roommate Opportunities to Care for Your Cat

feeding cat

Pet owners know that the love and loyalty of a pet are not given overnight; it has to be earned.

A straightforward way to achieve  love and loyalty from  your cat is to care for it. 

Allow your roommate opportunities to care for your cat, in small ways at first, but significant enough to help your it cat warm up more to your roommate.

  1. One of the best ways to get your roommate past hating your cat, is by showing them that it can be affection towards them, especially if your roommate feeds it .


For example, let your roommate be the designated “treat bearer.” Being the treat bearer means your roommate is responsible for always giving your cat treats. This type of treatment will help your cat quickly warm to your roommate, which can significantly alter their feelings of hate towards the animal.

  • Another excellent way is to leave for the night and let your roommate tend to your cat while you are away. This type of care will help increase the trust your cat has for your roommate, which will help it  interact better with your roommate.

  • You can also have a discussion with your roommate about taking on small day to day roles caring for  the cat. For example, if your roommate comes home from work before you do then allow them to feed it it’s evening meal.

Your cat will begin to associate your roommate with this care, and it will help your  cat  feel more comfortable around them.

 

8. Help Your Roommate Understand Cat Aggression and Anxiety

angry cat

Wikipedia, Jvanree, Angry Cat Attack

Every cat deals with aggression and anxiety on some level.

As a cat owner, over time, you come to know and understand what triggers your cat and how you can help make life more enjoyable for your pet.

Your roommate will know nothing about either of these, especially if they have never interacted with cats much. You will need to help them understand what cat aggression and anxiety are, and how they can help improve both factors for your pet.

In doing this, your roommate will have a better understanding of your cat,.  This will help improve their relationship over time as your roommate works to understand each issue.

  1. The best way to help your roommate understand cat aggression and anxiety is to sit them down and have a discussion on the topic.

  2. Explain to your roommate that most cats deal with some form of aggression and anxiety. Tell your roommate in detail how aggression and anxiety affect your cat specifically.

    For example, are there certain things that cause your cat to be aggressive or anxious? Let your roommate know what those specific things are so that they can work to be sure they do not cause any additional stress to the cat.

  3. Discuss with your roommate a plan of action to take if the cat does become aggressive or anxious. If a person is not used to being around a cat, they will not know how to react in a situation when a cat becomes anxious or aggressive.

    For your roommate, odds are they will react in the wrong way that will further agitate your cat,which will make them hate it even more.. Helping your roommate understand how to act in these situations can help them alter the cat’s behavior and help it to calm down.

  4. An excellent way to help a cat become less aggressive or anxious is to crouch down from a standing position. This position allows your roommate to be on the same level as the cat, which can help put your cat  at ease.

  5. Another way your roommate can help improve your cat’s behavior is to remove whatever is upsetting them.

    For example, if your roommate has over several guests over and your cat begins to exhibit aggressive, anxious behavior. , Then it is more likely that your  cat wil  feel stressed out due to the overwhelming crowd.

    Instruct your roommate to remove your cat from the loud, crowded area and place them into a comfortable, safe zone such as the bedroom. There they will be surrounded by their personal things like blankets, cat towers, litter box, food, etc.

 

9. How to Handle Dirt, Smell and Other Issues Your Cat May Cause

cat mess

Issues about how cats affect people’s living environment  are never easy topics to tackle.

The best way you can help improve the environmental strain your cat has on your roommate, is by being understanding, sympathetic, and open to doing what you can to improve the issues.

  1. For example, if your roommate is allergic to cats, you will need to work hard to help improve the environment you live in, so it is more manageable for them.

For example, you will need to keep the home as clean as possible to ensure your cat does not give off any excess dander that can trigger an allergic response for your roommate.

The best way to do this is by cleaning daily. For example, dusting and vacuuming to help reduce pet fur and dander. You can also invest in an air purifier to help cleanse the air of dander to minimize allergens.

  • Another way you can help improve environmental issues is by bathing your cat regularly and grooming them. It is recommended that you bath your cats at least once a week to help cut down on excessive dander and shedding.

    It is a good idea to invest in some conditioning shampoo that will not dry your cat’s fur out. You can also invest in excellent cat combs like the Furminator, which helps to eliminate the excessive undercoat to help prevent shedding.

  • For some people, their hate for cats comes from how much they hate cat litter. You can easily solve this environmental concern by cleaning up the cat litter frequently or by changing the litter type completely.

For example, if your roommate hates how much the cat tracks clay litter around the house, then you can switch to either crystal litter or hard pellet litter. Both litter types do the same job clumping clay litter does without the mess.

This is an excellent way to help be sure the house is free from litter waste. 

Writer: Kamie Allen

kamie allen

Sources:

https://ohmyapt.apartmentratings.com/roommate-pet.html

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https://www.bustle.com/p/how-to-make-your-partner-like-cats-if-they-dont-already-9030173

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